Attack of the Chipmunks: A Satirical Comedy

Attack of the Chipmunks: A Satirical Comedy 

by Michaela Johnson and Laurel Burlew

The year was 1924.  It was a warm summer day on the first of July.  Two 19-year-olds went out for a picnic around noon.  They went looking for an adventure at a nearby forest by the regional lake.

“Perfect day for a picnic, wouldn’t you say?”  Remarked Annalise as they picked out a spot by the stream that fed into the lake. 

“Why yes, Anna dear, we couldn’t have done better with timing.”  Replied Sophia Grace with a smile of contentment.  As they spread out the picnic blanket, the friends unpacked a plethora of snacks and two very chilled iced teas.  It was the perfect start to a tremendous afternoon.  The sound of the rushing water coupled with the ominous clouds created a serene feel to the landscape.  It was the perfect day for an adventure; then again, every day is, but this day the ambiance was perfect.  Yes, this day was the perfect day for an adventure.

They young women set out to spelunk and work up an appetite at a nearby cave at the lakeside.  Upon arrival at their site of exploration, they happened upon a quaint sight: there amongst their finger sandwiches sat an innocent-looking chipmunk. This chipmunk was rather a corpulent looking creature with lineament features.

“Oh, isn’t that the most charming creature?” exclaimed Sophia Grace.

“Why yes; what a refined little thing.”

As Anna spoke those words, the chipmunk looked up from its feast of finger sandwiches and locked eyes onto the girls.  Mesmerized, the girls fondly beheld the captivating sight of the small creature with food half stuffed in its mouth, staring at them. 

“We must have been gone for quite some time,” Annalise laughed; “the little buggar has already finished my crumpets.”

“At least he has not touched our iced tea!”

“Very true, dear, at least we can find solace in that.  But, whatever shall we eat now?  I was so looking forward to our delightful picnic.”

“Well, it would appear that this little nuisance is enjoying our picnic well enough.  It should be taught a lesson in touching homo-sapiens’ foodstuff!”

With that being said, the girls drew near to the varmint, aiming to shoo it away from their delicious lunches—or, at least, what was left of them.  So they started forward in pursuit of it.  As they drew near, the chipmunk became more aware of an imminent threat and stood on his haunches, swallowing the food and eyeing the girls with ferocity. 

Sophia Grace hesitated.  “Dear Annalise, I do believe this creature wishes to louse us up!”

“Do not fret, Sophia Grace, he is but a harmless, unintelligent rodent who knows nothing and wishes us no such ill will.”  With that being said, Annalise proceeded. 

But alas, the creature reared up, ready to strike the intruders of his domain.  Unable to listen to the council of her friend, Annalise was struck by the fierce little chipmunk as he launched himself at her face.  Sophia Grace stood in astonishment at such a vulgar sight—could it be that her friend was being assaulted?

As Sophia Grace rushed forward to the aid of her friend, she was detained by an air strike of acorns being shot down upon her from within the trees.  They pelted down, as if to make a statement.  Sophia Grace dared to look up, and beheld the most peculiar sight.  Dozens—nay, hundreds—of chipmunks prevented her from reaching her friend Annalise.  Annalise, meanwhile, was at the mercy of the villainous chipmunk that took to clawing at her face.  She was barely able to keep it from gouging out her crystal blue eyes, and could not hold on much longer.

Just in time, a handsome dark hobo came to her aid and fearlessly ripped the chipmunk her from face and threw it into the lake.  But no sooner had he saved her from tyranny did he himself find that there were two more, leaping from the treetops and latching themselves onto his legs, to avenge their friend.  This had given Annalise just enough time to rush to her friend, grab her hand, and proceed forward to the lake. 

The hobo trailed behind, limping after beating off the chipmunks—they had bruised and bloodied him badly, but he was a survivor.  He pointed out to the ladies a canoe that rested on the waterside, along the other side of the lake.  The trio dashed off to the canoe as quickly as their tired, bruised legs could carry them.  A rain of acorns followed them, relentlessly hitting them on their heads and shoulders.  War cries of chipmunks young and old rang out through the forest, and the girls knew that this may be their last moment.  But as this thought passed, they reached the canoe and were able to row to the safety of the open waters.

As they took a breath of relief and examined their injuries, they heard the eerie sound of roaring water.  But they were not alarmed at this, for they were more concerned with the physical state they were in.  Poor Annalise was bleeding profusely from cuts she received by the instigator.  Sophia Grace was already showing signs of bruises all over her perfect ivory complexion.  And the brave hobo, who shall not be named for the sake of his safety, could very well have lost a leg from the vicious attacks against him. 

“Listen,” The hobo warned, “I have run into these monstrous creatures before.  What may, on the exterior, appear to be a cute and cuddly chipmunk, is in reality a dangerous and bloodthirsty enemy of us homo-sapiens.  They cannot swim, and so we are safe.  As long as follow this lake to the river head, we shall be spared.”

What the trio did not foresee was that, between the lake and the river lay a waterfall.  This masterpiece of flowing glossy water, though beautiful, was in itself filled with danger.  While the group escaped the attacks from the unknowable chipmunks, they were headed straight in the direction of this powerful flow of water.

The last we saw of these, the hobo was shouting at the top of his lungs, urging the girls to attempt to row away from the waterfall.  But to no avail—they plummeted off the water’s edge into the unknown below.

To be continued…

4 books that should be classics

After having a great conversation with my mentor, I started thinking about something.  There are a number of books that we call "classics" and have become very acclaimed works of literature.  Books every person must reed in junior high, high school, or college.  As an English major, I may even have to read them more than once-- who knows.  But even though I love books, I don't necessarily agree with the books that have been labeled classics.  If I could choose 4 books to title "classics"-- therefore I would recommend them to everyone-- here would be my top 4 (in no particular order)...

1. The Giver by Lois Lowry.  This book is so intriguing and pulls you into its world right away!  It's a story of a young boy named Jonas who has been chosen for a very special but difficult task.  The Giver is written very well and the imagery is great; I can picture every thing and every person in this book vividly, yet it leaves room for the reader's imagination.

2. The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson.  This 1,000 page fantasy book seemed to never have a down moment!  While many classics are incredibly dull and boring, this book was intense and exciting, brimming with adventure.  It focuses on multiple story lines of people who have nothing in common and live on opposite sides of the world-- but, being that Sanderson is the author, you know that every detail is important and things will come together in ways you don't see coming.

3. Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins.  I actually debated whether or not to put this one on the list, because it's so overdone now and the book has lost a bit of its charm for me since becoming multiple movies and earning millions (or billions) of dollars.  But reading it the first time was a great experience, because it was unlike many books I had read previously.  The idea of the games being a fight to the death was reminiscent of old gladiator games, and it dealt with a lot of deep societal issues.  It also has some comedic relief, which can be a breath of fresh air.

4. Daniel Deronda by George Eliot.  Daniel Deronda is what I think of as an "almost classic".  This book was written in the 1800's and deals with a lot of the same themes and dramas as classics of the time.  The main character is an Englishman who finds out something about himself that changes the way he views himself and others around him.  There are beautiful women, dictating husbands, love triangles, and ultimately the decision between right and wrong.

So there you have it!  A couple of books I would recommend to be on the classics list.  What are your favorite books, and which ones do you think should be on the classics list? 
Keep being awesome; get out there and read some books!
"The library is my gym!"
~Laurel

Poem

"The mountains shake before You"-- that is put into perspective as I write from the top of Pikes Peak.  Here's a poem I wrote based on what I saw on the way up and the way I was feeling while at the top (other than light-headed!).

Lord, I see what Your hands have made;
You carved the hills and shaped the mountains
With Your mighty hand.
You breathe life into the trees,
You direct the path of the babbling brooks.
The wind curves along the mountain side,
And it goes where You lead it.
The grass grows from frozen ground
And flowers somehow bloom--
All at Your will, Lord; all when You say.
And I, Lord, I am your handiwork;
I am Your beautiful creation,
Just as the flowers and trees and mountains are.
You direct my path; You shaped me
With Your mighty hands.
For this I will rejoice; yes, for You
I will shout!
I will sing from my heart
And from this mountain top,
I will declare You to the world.

~Laurel

Free Write

I tried out a writing exercise my professor suggested we give a shot, and this is how it turned out...

Someone laughs.  Others are talking with each other.  A bag rustles.  "Blueberry?"  "Blueberry."  Ice being poured; coffee being ground.  Keys rustling.  Cashier buttons being pushed.  The door opens and closes.  "Grande decaf caramel mocha!"  The toaster beeps.  A mom is reading to her young daughter in a corner.  A man is studying.  The smell of coffee permeates the room.  "How you doin' there?"  Greeting customers.  Another laugh.  Cabinet doors open and close.  Water tap is turned on, then off.  More bags rustling.  The sound of customers' feet moving.  Friends meet up, smiling.  "How's it going today?"  Great customer service.  The baristas laugh again.  Green shirt and backpack walks in.  Floor being swept.  "What size?"  Cars moving by in the drive-thru.  Drinks being made.  Friends hanging out.  Smiles all around.  A morning with Starbucks.

My challenge to all of y'all is that you should try this sort of thing out!  Close your eyes, take in the sounds of things happening around you.  Open your eyes, and write.  It's best if you use a pen or pencil, rather than typing on a computer or something.  Don't look up, don't actually look at your surroundings.  Just listen and create words based on that.  It's pretty fun!

Keep on keepin' on!
~Laurel

6 Things To Pray For

Prayer can become monotonous-- we get stuck in the rut of the same prayers over and over again, and can be in danger of not really meaning what we say.  I hit this realization when I was 16, and decided that I need to be meaningful about prayer.  I am, after all, speaking to the God of the universe.  The One who created me.  My Lord and Saviour; my best friend.  People speak to their best friends all the time; that's what I want to do.  Like we are told to do in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, I want to "pray without ceasing."  I thought I'd compile a list of some great things we should be praying for.  (Mind you, this is just a short list-- the real list is endless!)

Pray for peace.  This is one of the biggest things for me; I am a natural worrier.  I worry about school, family, friends, life in general...basically any and every thing and person in my life.  I am constantly worrying about the future, the present, and even the past.  It has been a constant struggle in my life to let go of my anxiety and worries, and to live under God's protection and in His peace.  God constantly reminds us of peace in the Bible (it's as if he knows that humans struggle with worrying!  Shocking, I know) and those verses are very good reminders to me.  "For the Kingdom of God is...of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit;" "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace;" "For God is not a God of confusion, but of peace."  My favorite verse on this topic is Philippians 4:7, in which we are encouraged because "the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Pray for your country.  I think it's safe to say that our country needs our prayers.  It's full of people, most of whom do not know Jesus Christ as their personal Saviour.  They have not come to know Him and given their life over to Him.  This is incredibly sad, because we know that if we do not turn from our sins, repent, and believe in Him, we will be eternally separated from Him.  Every person in our country who does not know the Lord needs our prayer.  Even if we don't know all the people in this country (which we don't), we need to be praying for them!  And if you feel like praying for the country in its entirety sounds daunting, try praying for your city or state.

Pray for other countries.  As sad as it may be that our country has so many unsaved people in it, there are countries with many more people who need Christ in their lives.  Our country, thankfully, is one in which we have the freedom to openly worship God and share Him with others; there are many other people in this world, however, who do not have this freedom.  They meet underground to talk about Jesus.  They are in danger of being put in jail-- or worse-- if they are found out.  Our version of persecution in the states is people saying mean things about us or choosing to not hear about God when we ask.  Some people literally lose their lives simply because they love God with all their hearts, minds, and souls.  That is definitely something to pray about.

Pray for your least favorite person.  This is one I have recently adopted, much against my natural inclination.  Now, whether or not you have an enemy, per say, it is a great thing to pray for your least favorite person.  It may not change them and the things about them you can't stand, but I do promise you that it will change your heart and attitude towards them.  When I was in middle school, I was bullied by some kids who I thought were my best friends.  Things ended badly and I went through a dark spot in life; my heart was hardened against them and I wanted nothing good to come to them.  That's a natural response, because I was hurt, but it's not a godly response.  After years with a hardened heart, God broke through a wall and I began to pray for them.  My prayers were usually that, if they don't know the Lord as their Saviour, that God would reveal Himself to them.  And if they do know Him and have a relationship with Him, that He would bless them in their walk.  The latter of the two prayers is a hard one, even now.  But little by little, my heart is being softened and I am learning to forgive, let go of my hurt, and follow God's command in this way.

Pray for your spouse (or future spouse).  I am not married, but I do believe that God is preparing me for that one day.  While I don't know who I am going to marry, I know that he's alive and out in the world somewhere.  I know he's going through good and tough times in his life; he has joys and struggles, just like me and just like every other person in the world.  I pray that he is following the Lord, as I am.  I pray that God will be the center of our future relationship, and that we will grow more in love with Christ as we get to know each other and have a relationship one day. If you're married, I hope you are always praying for your spouse.  They need your prayers just as much as any other person, if not more!

Pray for yourself.  Sometimes I get stuck in praying for this person or that, because that's part of fellowship and being the body of Christ.  It's part of being the Church.  And when it comes to myself, I end up saying something like, "Well, if you could do this, that'd be great, but what I really want is for You to help this person over there, because I can see they're struggling so much."  Wait a minute.  Did I just put a limitation on God?  Oh heck no, that's not gonna happen!  He's certainly big enough to handle all of it; I'm not a chore or a bore for Him to listen to.  And He wants me to come to Him with my problems, my pitfalls; He wants to hear all about my life.  If I don't, it's as if I'm saying that I don't believe He can handle the problems I'm facing.  This is one I struggle with, because I don't want to burden anyone in my life by telling them the problems in my life.  Most people, even my good friends, don't know what I'm truly being challenged by.  But God-- I love that phrase, don't you?-- already knows my struggles, and wants me to come to Him with them.  When I'm joyful and things are going well, He wants me to tell Him about it.  It's all important!  There's nothing too big or too small for God to hear about, even in my own life.

This post has started a greater list of many people and things in my life I want to pray for.  I'm sitting here simultaneously writing the post and compiling the list in my head!  There are so many ways in which I need to come to God for comfort and understanding, and there are also many things for which I need to thank Him.
In what ways are you passionate about prayer?  Who/what has God placed on your heart to pray about or for?  I'd love to know.

~Laurel

School is no fun, but writing is...

Like most students, I don't particularly enjoy school.  I have never been a fan of math, and have only ever enjoyed one science course.  (Ironically, it was Physics-- the science course that involves the most amount of math.  Go figure.)  American History, in general, can be a bore for me.  And learning a new language, while sometimes fun, is not exactly my cup of tea.  However!  I could spend all day reading, writing, and learning more about the world of English.  Certain topics spark my interest, and I could study those till the end of time.
Luckily for me, I have enrolled in a creative writing class over the summer.  Oh darn, I need it for my degree.  Haha!  For our first assignment, I am required to write about my current writing environment, and go into detail about sights, smells, feels, sounds, etc.  This was a fun way to begin the class, and I am so excited to go through this course.  It makes me excited for getting my English degree!  Anyway.  Here's what I wrote:

The distant sounds of airplanes crossing the morning sky, construction taking place across the golf course, and Star Trek: Next Generation fill the empty space around me.  A light breeze sweeps along my face, bringing with it the scent of freshly cut grass.  I sneeze, and my nose begins to itch.  My attention is on the clicking sounds of the keyboard; with each word, I notice the itch in my wrists even more.  I look down and see red spots developing, creeping up along my arms.  I write faster, and shift my focus now to the hard wood surface on which I am sitting.  The sun is beating down on my skin-- perhaps more than I will like in a day or two.  The 'tap, tap' of paws comes creeping up alongside me, and the furry red tank sits down next to me, panting.  Our deck is big enough for the two of us as he sprawls out next to me, but only just.  The feeling in my wrists return, and I forget to fight the urge to scratch the irritated skin.  This time I sneeze twice in succession, one right after the other.  The smell penetrates my deepest concentration, and a sigh escapes my mouth.  Time to move indoors already, I suppose, despite the effort to stay in the sun for a few moments.


A tip to writers: When you struggle with writer's block, this can be a great way to get rid of it.  Instead of writing about whatever it is you're writing, take a look at the environment around you and write it out.  Go into as much detail as you like about whatever catches your eye.  Try writing in a way you aren't used to, and even choose to write without using certain key words you often use!  Get creative.
Summer is a perfect time to write, in my opinion, so I encourage y'all to get out there and write!  And by that, I mean open up the windows, turn on some music, find a comfy spot in the house, and write like crazy.  Don't go outside-- you might get an allergic reaction like I do.  (Dun, dun, duuuun)

Hakuna Matata!
~Laurel

A Random Story

Here's a random story that I found from March 16 (2014). It isn't completely gramatically correct and some of the ideas aren't very fluid but being that our blog is about the importance of living creatively and DOING whether things are perfect or not, I decided I should share this with ya'll. 

When I wrote this story I was really overwhelmed with life and I began to think about what it would be like if I had my own land to escape to whenever I was overwhelmed. Writing really helps me when I'm struggling (especially emotionally) and you can kind of see this in the story as it starts with a more uptight and concrete idea and then it becomes much more free and abstract. I hope this story might be able to speak to you in some way or another, even if you find it a bit strange ;0)

'Sometimes I wish I could go to my own blank corner of the world.

I could stay there for weeks and I could paint it mine. I would spend hours drawing and I would write so many stories. I would create an extravagant wardrobe that seems like it would only fit for costumes. I would sing. I would sing as loudly or as softly as I wanted and every time my voice chimed, flowers would grow all around me. Whenever I smile, there would be a soft warm light, waiting to make me at home, and whenever a tear fell from my face, it would water the earth beneath my feet so that new seeds would be planted and I would be able to enjoy them once they grow. I wouldn't wear shoes and my hair would never be a problem. In fact, I might not even have hair. Every time I felt tired, a tree branch would spring up and create a hammock for me. I would rest my head for hours at a time, and once I was ready, I would get up and dance. The best music I could imagine would be played by the nature around me and all the animals would dance with me.

I would read books and watch movies.

I would learn new languages and I would learn new instruments-- some which were only in my imagination and they would make sounds that no one else would have ever heard before. 

I would jump on clouds that were low to the ground and I would take pictures of it all.

Sometimes, I would slay dragons, just because it made me feel more brave but then I would use a special type of healing flower to heal the dragons again because we only fought for fun. We acted like I was "slaying the beast," but in reality we were just playing around. They knew how much I had always wanted to slay a dragon before I had ever met one and learned that it is impossible for them to be mean. You see, there is a myth that dragons try to eat and harm people, when in fact, dragons are kind creatures that are born with all the nutrients they need to sustain themselves for the rest of their life. Best of all, dragons have the ability to feel human emotion. If you look into a dragon’s eye, the creature will feel the exact emotion you are feeling— and in that moment, an inseparable bond is created.

I would ride the skies on the dragons’ backs and look over the streams. When it got particularly hot outside in the afternoons, I would jump off the dragon’s back, into a pool of water. Diving in and out of waterfalls, jumping from ginormous cliffs. I'd swim with exotic fish and sometimes I would invite a friend or two.

These moments were some of the best I’d ever lived, and if you were lucky enough to join me from time to time, you’d understand what I mean.

I would stay in my corner of the world for days (and with company—weeks—at a time) but eventually; I would have to return to the real world. However, I didn’t mind; it was a beautiful life I lived. I could live much like any other person, and learn from enduring the hardships of the world but I also had another space to call my own, a perfect sanctuary when I needed it. This time of my life was wonderful...

But then one day, when I tried to open the door to my corner of the world, I couldn't open it. The door was locked! I sat there for hours, banging on it and crying as if that would somehow help me, but it didn't! No matter how much I screamed or begged the invisible person that was never even there, I couldn't open that door back up again. I cried myself to sleep for days and days as I sat right under that door, thinking that someone else might walk by and swing it wide open for me, but of course no one ever did. No one ever could.

In fact, by the third day of my panic, I turned to the door with a look of dread as I saw it slowly start to disappear right before my very eyes. "NO!!!" I screamed, "NOOOOO! YOU CANT TAKE THIS FROM ME!" I continued screaming at the invisible no one. "Please! Please! NO!" I yelled as I lunged for the dissolving white door. And just like that, it was gone.

"Forever," I thought, "the one thing I knew I could hold onto is gone.... It's gone forever..." I sat there for what felt like hours, but in reality was but a few minutes, wondering what I did to deserve this and why this might have happened. Disappointment, fear, anger, sadness... They're all feelings that crossed my heart, but above all was shock. I couldn't believe that I had just seen the door to my sanctuary disappear before my very eyes, nor could I believe that in that moment, I felt I had nothing left to live for and while I considered jumping off a bridge or simply sitting there to starve, I knew that there had to be something more to the whole thing. Just as I was about to ask myself where to begin, a note fell beside me, as if someone had opened a door and slid the note inside. It read,

"While some waste their lives away for joyless means of surviving,

Others find there is more to life, so they help to begin the reviving.

They start the day with simple joys, until they find there is more to life,

And once they start, they can't be stopped, just like the wind in a kite."

I didn't know it quite yet, but this day would later be known as the day an adventure began, and eventually, I might even call it “the day THE adventure began,”...and all it took was a split second of thinking and the ability to rise to my feet and say, "Alright then. I think it's time we get started. Change doesn’t change by itself…"

To be continued…

Possibly…'

Thanks for readin' y'all. Love ya longtime!

Live, Learn, Love, Leave a Legacy,
                                        & Stay Creative,

                     Emma