This one's for the girls

Photo by Laurel Burlew

Dear single girls waiting for the right guy to come along,

Let's stop wasting our time and searching for the wrong type of attention.  How about instead, we actually start doing what we say we're doing--waiting?  How about we stop advertising our singleness and stop chasing after guys?  How about we stop treating guys like eye-candy and start treating them with the same respect we say we want?  Can we stop missionary dating or settling for a guy who isn't passionate about God?  Can we do that?  Great.  Let's get started.

Photo by Laurel Burlew

First off!  Did y'all know that there's a difference between saying "I'm waiting for such and such" and actually waiting?  It's true.  This isn't just the case with relationships; it's true in many areas of life.  Waiting means having patience, and that word literally means "long suffering."  Basically, patience sometimes means suffering for a long time.  If you're at the point in life when you're waiting for the right guy, it's important to actually wait.  When we feel the desire to have a Godly relationship but it just hasn't happened yet, it can be easy to start searching (even if you don't admit it or tell anyone that you're searching).  We take our eyes off the main goal--loving Christ and making Him known--and instead we spend our time constantly thinking about this guy or that.  Dropping hints.  Pursuing them.  Gettin' a little to friendly.  One guy today, another tomorrow.  It's time for a break!

Photo by Laurel Burlew

Secondly...If you're single, cool.  If you're in a relationship, cool.  Both are stages of our lives and we won't ever be completely happy or have a perfect life in either case.  If you're single and lovin' it, then there's really no need to constantly post on social media about how content you are and how you are just loving your life--go out there, live it!  Be an example to the rest of us by living a life on fire for God.  If you're content with where you are, wherever that is, don't be concerned about telling people.  When we see a woman like you living that content life happily and wonderfully, we'll notice.  It'll inspire us to do the same.

Photo by Laurel Burlew

Third, respect.  We all want to be respected, especially by guys, but girls in this culture have one big issue: we don't respect men!  Man Crush Mondays when we drool over celebrities.  Posting pictures of celebrities all over social media.  Creating secret boards devoted to pictures of hotties.  Talking about how hot this guy is and how gorgeous that one is.  Think about it this way: if a guy in your life were to always be posting about, posting photos of, and talking about how "hot" a female celebrity is, would you respect him?  Probably not a whole lot.  Like me, you might even get a little offended.  It's a two-way street, ladies!  If we want respect from others, we need to give respect to others.  So, please, for your sake and for the sake of everyone who you are associated with on social media, stop posting about guys.

Photo by Laurel Burlew

Finally and MOST IMPORTANTLY!  A man whose heart is not after God's should not be after yours.  Remember in the Bible, where we're told not to be "unequally yoked" to non-believers (2 Corinthians 6:14)?  It's really, really good advice to follow.  When your main goal in life is to follow God and a guy's main goal in life does not match up with that, a lot of things are going to go wrong. Commonly known as 'missionary dating,' girls tend to meet guys who are nice, per say, but not Christians...and we think if we date them, they'll become believers.  Maybe he'll change.  Maybe he'll realize how awesome God is!  However, it's a lot easier to be pulled down into the mess of the world than to bring someone up from it.  Relationships with non-believers really aren't a good idea.  God has someone in mind who is going to love Him in a way that will make your relationship 100 times more amazing than it could be if you date a non-Christian.  So, please, wait for that guy! 

Ladies, y'all are awesome.  I love my sisters in Christ!  And I know it'll be a challenging road, but it will be oh so worth it.  Take heart, ladies!  You are not alone.  None of us--no matter what we're going through in life, no matter what we're facing--are ever alone.